Hosting my First Sleepover

I remember going to sleepovers and having sleepovers at my home growing up. Your friends would show up, you'd play with toys or talk, get your sleeping bag set up, watch a movie and stay up late talking until a parent showed up and said it was time to quiet down and go to sleep. When my daughter asked for a sleep over as her birthday party (she turned 7 this year), I said okay, knowing that there would be a late night in store for me, but a happy little girl as well. At first I thought, "Heck, I've been to sleepovers, I know what to do." Then the arrogance of that statement sunk in and I realized maybe I should check around on the Internet and see what other moms do and what's expected at today's sleepovers. Boy was I surprised. I found suggested timelines for the evening's events, suggestions of non-stop games and activities so the darlings (heavens forbid!) don't get bored, do's and don'ts lists and appetizers you might see at a grownup party-but really for kids? I soon realized sticking them in front of a tv with their sleeping bags and a bowl of popcorn probably wouldn't cut it.

So I got to work. I figured out a rough schedule of events, keeping in mind that if circumstances dictated, the plans could shift or change. I made lists for the decorations, food, crafts and take-home bags. I shopped, and shopped until I could find just about everything. It slowly hit me that this sleepover party idea was actually way more work than your standard 2 hour pool party! I'd like this post to be helpful to other moms so I'll organize the rest based on topic. Overall the party went really well, none cried, no one was excluded and the girls even slept for a few hours. It was exhausting but worth it.

Invitations: Don't make a huge deal about it. I contacted two moms through Facebook and the other two girls my daughter wanted to invite were sent invitations to school.There is alot of debate about inviting friends through school but if I don't know the family already how exactly should I contact them otherwise? So, I feel pretty justified sending the invites through school. Only one girl declined, she had her grandparents visiting that weekend. That brought the grand total to 3 girls (+ my daughter). I wanted to keep my first sleepover small to minimize any girl drama or sleep time issues.

Food: I realized that even though the party was starting at 6:30, some girls might not have eaten supper.So I had a cheese pizza and a cheese and pepperoni pizza waiting for the girls as they arrived.  Aside from that I ordered the birthday cake, bought movie snacks (popcorn, chips and candy-smarties and sour chewy candy), and breakfast food which consisted of cereal, pancakes, strawberries, cinnamon rolls and pop tarts.
I had more than enough food for everything, and if I do this again I would reduce the options for breakfast.

Decorations and Craft: My daughter wanted a Monster High theme, so I made sure she had a Monster High themed birthday cake. On top of that I bought three different streamers, a Happy Birthday banner, some balloons,a pink tablecloth, napkins, plates and cutlery, a few hanging pink stars and I made some paper flowers out of tissue paper I had lying around. I decorated the kitchen-eating area where we would have the craft, pizza and cake (and breakfast the next morning) and the den where they would watch their movie and sleep.
For the craft I bought some white canvas tote bags and ironed on each girls name to the top of their bag. The girls were given fabric crayons and fabric markers, along with a bunch of glittery stickers and rhinestones to decorate their bags however they wished. Each girl was also given a pair of silly foam glasses to decorate, a bookmark, a feather boa and a paper crown.That kept the girls busy for a good hour. It sounds like alot of stuff but I wanted to make sure the girls would be busy (the former teacher in me coming out!).

Kitchen/dining area

Crafts

Movie: So after the craft we opened presents, then had cake. Once that was over I asked the girls to get changed into their nighttime outfits and get their beds set up. That gave me time to clean up the craft/present/cake mess in the kitchen and get the movie snacks ready for them. Once I got downstairs to the den I found the girls had managed to get changed but were having some issues figuring out how to setup their sleeping bags/blankets for bed. I jumped in and made sure everyone had a blanket and a pillow, then we managed to settle on a movie. The movie kept most of the girls interested, but after an hour it started to fizzle out and the girls started to play with the different toys in the room. So the movie wasn't the central activity as it was when I was a kid, okay, times are changing and kid's attentions spans are not what they used to be. So, it was time to go to bed (it was 10:00 anyhow). I told the girls they could talk but they had to stay in their sleeping bags/area. They settled down and after about 4 "warnings" of, "time to quiet down and go to sleep" they were pretty much okay by 11:30pm.

Breakfast: The girls were up before dawn the next morning, at about 6:30am. I grabbed my robe and started cooking for the next hour. The girls loved the pancakes and strawberries. Only one wanted cereal so I was glad I hadn't gone out and bought a variety pack of mini cereals. After breakfast the girls got changed, brushed their teeth and started playing with barbies. The girls didn't really care to get packed up so I just went to each girl's bag and threw in what I knew belonged to each girl and asked when I wasn't sure who's leggings were who's. I made sure the beloved stuffies were sent home with their rightful owners and asked the parents to pick them up between 8:30-9am. I had read on another mother's blog that she had gone ahead and planned another craft the next morning which really only dragged out the party to the lunch hour, making for a cranky birthday child and mom later in the day. I decided to take her advice and have the girls picked up early. All of the parents showed up promptly and we only had one stray jacket left behind.

Like I said, all in all in was a really busy birthday party, and while yes, it is cheaper than renting a place, the time and energy to plan and host a birthday sleepover should really be considered prior to agreeing to one. Also, behavior guidelines for your own child (as the hostess/host of the party) should be defined before guests arrive. My daughter was a great host to her friends but also wanted to be the "cool" kid and did have a couple of back-talk issues my husband and I later addressed with her. The friends were great, hyper but alot of fun and I would have any of them back again for a sleepover. Personally though, I think I might encourage more one on one friend sleepovers in the future-I think those may be a bit easier (and cheaper) to manage!

Why Vote?

The provincial election is around the corner and I don't think I've ever been this excited to exercise my democratic right to vote. I feel the party that has been in power has only hurt the people of this province-since the first day they were elected 4 years ago and threw themselves a grandiose party on the taxpayer's dime. Since then I've only watched my power and water bills grow, school funding cut for my daughter (and all other children of this province) forcing her into combined grade classes in elementary school, the ax of the well established and successful reading recovery program which has resulted in my daughter now taking the piss-poor substitute program that sees her not learning from a specialized teacher, but other children, road repairs that have been horrid patch jobs that must be done over and over again, outright fraud of certain MLAs in how they spend the taxpayer dollar, overcrowded ERs rooms, where people wait for DAYS to be seen because all the beds are taken by the elderly that should be in long time care beds that don't exist...the list goes on and on.

Yet I hear from alot of people my age and younger they don't see the value in their vote, the "what's the point-all the parties are crooked" idea that results in ambivalence towards provincial politics (and all politics in general). I argue that voting in the local and provincial elections is even more important that voting in the federal election as the results of the provincial election will more directly impact us taxpayers in the next four years than any federal election has in recent memory.

In my own riding we have an MLA who has won the past two elections. While she is a nice person and has managed to avoid the mud-slinging that pervades the party she belongs to, it is time for a new face with new ideas. She takes credit for starting the ball rolling on a proposed high school for my area, but this idea has been pushed by the parents of the community for many years, and I truly feel it was a more politically charged strategic move that has driven the political support for the new high school. Regardless, that is the one positive thing that has come out of the last four years. That said I hope to welcome a new MLA to the role in the next couple of weeks, one that will work hard to continue to push for the new high school, will support revisions to the power company monopoly of this province, bring back the outsourcing of road repairs and take a hard look at the existing out of date grade school curriculum and the disservice it does to our children's futures. I implore all voting citizens of Nova Scotia, to exercise their right to vote on October 8th-if you don't you really have no right to complain after the election is over!

Welcome

I'm a 30-something mom of a beautiful girl and wife to a wonderful husband. Both my husband and myself are university educated, have full time jobs, own our own home, own a car...you know, everything you are "supposed" to have by the time you are in your thirties. At least that's what North American society has shown us we should expect and strive for all of our lives. And while there is nothing wrong with the way we live or how we came to this situation, I see every day how the cultural norms of my mother's generation just don't apply any longer to people my age and younger. The Internet has made our world very small and the social issues we face can change by the hour thanks to this marvel of technology. Even the jobs my husband and I have wouldn't have existed when my parents were, well, young parents.

I've created this blog for a couple of purposes. First, I seriously need a place to vent. There are very few people in my life that have a life similar to mine. I actually know of 2 other women I can relate with. Yup, only 2 other women who are well educated, independent of their parents (financially), have their own place, hold a full time job and struggle to be super-mom when they walk through the door every night. Second, I realize I am living through a time of social upheaval and change thanks to innovations in technology, health care, education and human rights. I feel I might be letting my daughter down if I don't write some of my experiences down for her so when she's my age she can look back and see into this part of my life and maybe how it affected her and the woman she will one day become.

So...welcome. If you happen across this blog and it speaks to you, awesome I'd be thrilled to hear from other moms who also struggle with merging the 70's family stereotype with the social norms of this new century.